First Visit

Our tickets are booked and plans are set to go to Haiti in the middle of January for about 3 days. We'll get a chance to meet David!, see the orphanage, and have a mini-tour of the area.

David update

We just got an e-mail letting us know that as of this week, David can now stand up by himself in the crib. Woo hoo, way to go David!

I love hearing snippets of information like this. But it also makes it a lot harder not to be there with him. We're planning a trip for mid-January to go to Haiti and meet him. We wish we could go there tomorrow, but practically we know that it makes more sense to wait. We're definitely looking forward to planning the trip!

We have entered IBESR

Our dossier is now in the hands of IBESR.

Here's a more detailed description of the steps to come (taken from this website). We're through the first two parts and are onto the third part.

Minister of Foreign Affairs (MFA) (2-4 weeks)
First Legalization (1st Legal). This is where all of the papers are authenticated.

File prepared for IBESR (Concurrent with MFA) (1-4 weeks)
When the paperwork is at Foreign Affairs, your lawyer must prepare your file for IBESR. IBESR requires that the paperwork be in a certain order. The social history and psychological examination required by IBESR for your child must be made during this period. It involves putting the child's social information into a home study format with your home study information.

IBESR (2-6 months)
Your child's paperwork is put together with your documents and the file is then presented to IBESR (Haiti's Social Service Department) where a social worker will look over all of your documents and decide whether to approve your adoption request.The director of IBESR, the IBESR lawyer, the head of adoption services at IBESR, and the IBESR social worker must all sign off on your dossier. This is four stages of approval.

Parquet (2-12 weeks)
This step involves one person(?) releasing the child(ren)'s file(s). Parquet is the head commissioner. He is intertwined with court. He asks all of the birth parents to come for interviews to make sure that they understand that there children are being adopted. Apparently there was some fraudulent activity going on and he wants to protect the birth parents interests. i.e. make sure they are in agreement.

Civil Court Legalization (2-8 weeks)
The adoption is finalized. After this point, the children are legally yours. (2nd Legal)

Minister of Interior Affairs (MOI)/Haitian Immigration (2-14 weeks)
The file is submitted into the passport process. The passports are printed in the adopting parents last name.

DHS Processing (U.S. Parents) (1-3 weeks)
I-600 is filed by adopting parents. File is reviewed and approved by DHS.

DNA Testing (0-6 weeks)
May or may not be necessary. Depends on DHS' opinion.

Consulate/Visa Appointment (1 week lead time)
Child receives visa in preparation for travel to their new home

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Total Time: 19 week - 76 weeks (~5- 19 months)

Cry of the Orphans Week

A year ago, Jay and I tuned into some radio broadcasts during 'Cry of the Orphan' week. What a life-changing week that was for us! From those broadcasts, Jay and I first began to seriously discuss adoption as a possibility in our lives.

Well, its that time of year again and Family Life Ministries has teamed up with some other organizations to dedicate this week of broadcasts to the Cry of the Orphan. If you want to listen to these broadcasts, they will be on the radio, downloadable from online, or available as Podcasts. Here's a link for more info.

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Here's a copy of the e-mail I received last week:

Today there are more than 143 million orphans in the world. That's approximately one-half of the population of the U.S.! Most of these children live in poverty, are malnourished and experience daily rejection. For this reason, FamilyLife™, Focus on the Family®, and Shaohannah's Hope along with Crown Financial Ministries are joining hands and voices with more than 75 orphan care providers, church-based orphan ministries, and adoption agencies to plead the cause of orphans in need. But we can't do it alone. No matter who you are, where you live or what you do, you can make a difference. From praying for orphans, to going on mission trips, from mentoring a child, to adopting one (or more), there is a place for everyone because you are God's plan for the orphan. To learn more, listen to the special radio broadcasts during "Cry of the Orphan" week on “FamilyLife Today," “Focus on the Family," and "Money Matters" Nov. 12-16, and visit cryoftheorphan.org. Join us as we boldly endeavor to answer God's call.

Introducing....

The referral came (and has been accepted!).

We'd like to introduce you to David!

Our caseworker called us Thursday night to let us know that she had received some pictures and David's medical record. She dropped them off to us on Friday. The medical record was still in French (the English version is coming next week), but thanks to numerous online translators we were able to figure most of it out.

David is 6 months old (born May 2, 2007) and is a healthy little guy who at 4 months olds weighed 14 pounds (more than Josh was at that age) and was 25 inches.

We accepted the referral and now wait some more. This time we're waiting on the Haitian government. Depending on how quickly their adoption offices are moving, David could be here with us anywhere from a few months from now to a year or more. Prayers are greatly appreciated! Our hope is to visit David in Haiti within the next few weeks, but we're waiting to hear back from our agency and the orphanage to see if they'd rather we get through the first few government steps before visiting.

Here are some more pictures. These are from the end of August, so he's about 4 months old at the time. The woman in the pictures is David's birth mom, Gerda. Jay and I were pretty choked up looking at her and realizing how difficult this whole situation is. There are definitely a lot of emotions involved from every angle. We also know that these pictures are going to be like gold to David as he grows up.

We'll keep you updated as we find out more.

Grants

Several months ago, Jay and I got into grant application mode. Basically, we researched adoption grants and then applied for everything and anything we found that seemed to even remotely apply to us.

We're happy to announce that a few weeks ago we received a $3000 grant and today we got a phone call that we received a $2500 matching grant. Woohoo!!

News from the agency's Haitian visit

Lots more info! The people from our agency who visited Haiti and the orphanage 2 weeks ago are back and gave us some updates. Every little bit of info we receive about Haiti, the orphanage, etc. makes the finalized adoption just seem closer.

Some cool news:

• According to the orphanage's attorney, our dossier is in perfect order (Definitely nice to hear after the work that went into it!)
• Talks and processes for our adoption have been going on the past few months even though we haven't been aware of it :-)
  
• There is a little boy that had bloodwork done two weeks ago. The assumption is that he'll be referred to us :-) We've been told not to be in 'expectation mode' yet for this specific child, because there are always lots of unknowns, but it sure is nice to have an idea that he could be the one.
  

Here are some quotes from the e-mail we received. Its eye-opening to the differences of life here versus there.

"On our way to the hotel they gave us a little sight seeing tour around downtown PAP. People are always outside socializing, selling, and buying. There is virtually no infrastructure in Haiti - most have no power at all and those who do may only get it for an hour or two a week unless you have a $10,000 generator/inverter set-up (only the wealthy have this.) There is also no public water so everyone has to get it from streams (dirty) or buy it from the water truck."

"The orphanage is a small house with a foyer which is the play room, a dining area with a child sized table and two long benches, a bedroom with a row of bunks and a couple of cribs, a store room, bathroom, and kitchen. There is no power or running water. The food is cooked on a camp style stove and water is purchased in big "culligan man" style bottles. A refrigerator and stove were donated but there is not power to operate them. We will be doing a fundraising effort to help purchase a generator (~$7,000). Nothing is cheaper in Haiti - almost nothing is made there so things are imported from the US or other countries. Land is expensive, food is expensive, gas is expensive, everything is expensive. I think this is shocking to most people as we tend to assume the US dollar would go far in a poor country - not so here. "

"The children were all delightful each with their own personalities and senses of humor. At first they just took us in but when the playtime started (Rachel can start an instant party by pulling out the plastic sunglasses) they were such a hoot. They wanted us to hold them and play games with them and loved seeing their faces in the digital camera. There are three caretakers for the children who do all the cooking, cleaning, laundry by hand, and child minding. We dined with the children and were amazed at how good rice and beans (and I think eggplant) could be and at how much the children eat. Little ones eat a big plateful and they don't leave a morsel on their plates."

"The office [I'm assuming government office] is hard to describe - hotter than heck, people everywhere, people behind old desks with manual typewriters, and yes, a storage closet full of dossiers. I did see one man on a lap top though. It appears that they [the heads of the orphanage] have good relationships with the officials but everything seems to take a long time here - nothing is logistically easy."

"On our last day we returned to [the orphanage] where [the director] was already there visiting with birth parents. We sat around on little toddler chairs and talked about their lives - and family planning. It is hard to put yourself in other people's shoes. It was very hard for me to accept the reality that these children have families who love them but who are so desperate that they want to relinquish them in the hopes that they will have a better life and that it will lessen their burden such that they too may have a better life. You can't help but want to scream at the injustice of their lives."

Almost but not meant to be referral

We got an e-mail last night letting us know that there was a little girl they were considering for us. However, they found that she has active syphilis and thus is 'unadoptable'. We don't know anything more about her or her situation, but we're assuming that her chances of survival are very low. Our prayers are with this little girl.

Another update on the referral wait

Its been a while since we last updated, so I thought I'd let everyone know that the wait for a referral continues.

I talked to our case worker a few days ago and she's not quite sure what is causing the wait either. She works through the Haitian adoption coordinator who works directly with the orphanage -- I know, a lot of third parties! It was great talking to her though, because it was clear that she's doing everything she can to find more information for us. Communication is just slow.

This past Sunday the coordinator went to Haiti to visit the orphanage, so our hope is that they will come back with some information (and hopefully a referral!!!).

"What I've said, that will I bring about; what I planned, that will I do." Isaiah 46:11

Still waiting

Well, not much news to report yet. But I thought I'd at least report the lack of news :-P

Right now we're just waiting for the referral to tell us all about our child. We did find out that they're running lab work on some babies right now (they have to be tested for HIV), and we're hoping that once that's done then the referral will come.

Up-to-date on travel immunizations

Yesterday we went to the travel clinic here in town and got all of the shots necessary for traveling to Haiti (in anticipation of us going in the next few months). We ended up with 2 shots, 1 in each arm, and were then in pain for about the next 24 hrs! A heads up to anyone getting the typhoid vaccine: get it in your non-dominant arm because it'll be sore. We also have a prescription for malaria pills just waiting for us when we have an actual departure date.

Orphanage FAQs

After watching the videos from the last post, I realized how little I knew about the orphanage itself so I e-mailed my agency some questions. Here are their responses :-)

Where is Rivers of Hope located?

• It is about a 30 minute car ride from Port au Prince.

How was it started?

• A missionary family in Haiti (Willem and Beth seen in the Sofia film) has an orphanage/school/clinics and was approached by visiting missionaries to assist with adoptions. They did for a few but knew the need was greater than they could handle given their other mission responsibilities. They had a friend of many years from church, Rachel (also in the film), who operated a preschool in Haiti who was asked to assist. Rachel started coordinating these adoptions but knew there were more children who needed families. Through church contacts we were linked. After meeting with us and knowing our commitment to place children she used her own finances to open the orphanage in February 2007.

How many children are at the orphanage?

• 10. The age range is infant up to about 4 years old.

How/why do most of the children come to be in the orphanage?

• For the most part, their parents are located near by and simply cannot provide for them due to various factors.

How many workers work there?

• Rachel is there often but does not stay overnight. There are 2 nannies who care for the children in the home.

How is the orphanage funded?

• Rachel used her own finances to start the facility. She has received donations as well. Part of the adoption fees will go to care for the children and support the mission and care of more children.

Bringing Home Sophia Video

Our agency recently posted a link to a video another couple made about their adoption story:





They are adopting from the same orphanage (Rivers of Hope), as us, so it was awesome to get to see on this video the orphanage, the people who we'll meet, and the kids! It gives us a much better idea of what is to come in the future. Total the videos are about 18 minutes long, and I posted them because I thought some of you might to watch too.

I'm pretty sure that in this video, the couple is meeting their new daughter, Sophia, for the first time, but their paperwork is still being processed by the Haitian government. Hence, they will not be able to take her back to the States with them until a later date. Our hope is to make a similar trip to Haiti in the next few months in order to get to visit our child!

Dossier Heading to Haiti!

I dropped off our completed dossier to our agency this morning! It should be in Haiti by the end of next week :-)

Chicago Trip went smoothly

My trip to Chicago on Thursday went very smoothly. After getting to the Secretary of State's office I was in and out with my authenticated documents within 15 minutes. I'm really glad that I went (rather than sending things through the mail), because there was 1 document that had been notarized incorrectly and so they would have had to send it back to me to fix if I hadn't been there. Instead, I was able to take care of it right then and there. The Haitian Consulate was about a 2 minute walk down State Street from the Sec of State, and I was in and out of there in about 5 minutes. Quick and easy! One day trip to Chicago saved us a few weeks of mail going back and forth. If only there hadn't been traffic on the Dan Ryan and parking costs weren't atrocious! :-P

I-171H Approval?

All of our dossier paperwork is about ready to go to Haiti. I'm going to head up to Chicago this week and go to the Secretary of State's Office, to the Haitian Consulate, and then hand them off to the French Translators. It sounds like all of this can be done in about an hour and a half. Luckily they're all within a few blocks of each other! A week later, I'll have them back and then off they go to Haiti.

Only problem is that we're not quite sure if we need to have heard back from the US Citizenship & Immigration (CIS) office yet with our I-171H approval. From what I've been reading it seems unnecessary to have at this time, but if the word comes back from our agency that it is mandatory now then we'll have another 6-8 weeks to wait before sending the dossier, sigh.

Speaking of possible slowdowns, it looks as through the adoption process in Haiti is taking a loooong time. So, instead of the 6 months or so that we were hoping our paperwork would be in the Haitian adoption system, it looks more like 12 months. Hence, after we receive a referral for our child it'll likely be another year until they are in the States (Summer '08). Yet, its all in God's hands, and He knows what He's doing so we're feeling alright with it. But I'm still keeping my fingers crossed the Haitian adoption system gets moving!

Home Study Complete

Our Home Study is now complete. One more thing checked off the list!

Home Study Finishing Up

Last night, we had the 'home' study portion of the Home Study. Meaning, our social worker, Diane, actually came to the house to check and make sure that our living conditions are acceptable. In preparation, I spent the day cleaning and scrubbing the house so it looked in pristine condition. I have to admit I'm a little disappointed she didn't actually inspect our toilets to see how clean they were! (Because, you know, clean toilets are definitely a sign of good parenting!) Mainly, she just walked around the house and made sure we knew to keep poisonous items out of a child's reach, had working smoke detectors, and a basic plan on where the new baby will sleep. She also met Josh, who was very ready for bed by that point, but was in a great mood. He definitely made us look good.

Last week, Jay and I each met with her for our individual interview portion of the Home Study. Diane is so easy to talk with, and so the interviews were far from nerve-wrenching. She asked questions which easily led into other questions, and before I knew it, the interview was done. I've really been happy working with her so far. We feel very comfortable asking her questions, and she's amazing at addressing concerns that we have.

Our fingerprint clearances just came in the mail, so now all that is left for the Home Study is for Diane to type it up. She'll then send the Home Study to CIS (Citizenship & Immigration Services) in order to complete our I-600A Orphan Application. Once that is completed we'll:

1. Send everything (aka. the Dossier) to Springfield in order to have our notarized documents authenticated.
2. Send these authenticated documents to Chicago to be translated into French.
3. Send these French, authenticated documents to the Haitian Consulate in Chicago to be authenticated one last time.
4. Send these re-authenticated, French, authenticated documents to Haiti where they'll then match us with a child!

More donation options

Wow, the response from our 'Orphanage Baby Shower' post has been incredible. Thanks to everyone who has wanted to be a part of helping out the orphanage in this way :-)

A friend recently e-mailed me and asked if there was any other way to donate besides through the registries. Yes! If you'd rather you can just go straight to the source. The Florida-based agency is delivering all donations to the Haitian orphanage.

Here's the address where donations of any kind can be sent:
Lifelink c/o First Congregational Church UCC
1031 S. Euclid Ave.
Sarasota, FL 34237

And here are some specifics that they requested:
"Health and hygiene items (tooth brushes, hair items, diaper cream, Tylenol/digital thermometers); Children's clothing and shoes (short and long sleeves, sandals & sneakers, underclothes, sleepwear, jackets/sweaters, cloth diapers and plastic pants); Linens (bath towels and wash cloths, towels for kitchen, sheet sets for single beds, crib sheets, mattress pads/protectors, blankets, pillows); Toys (educational toys, stuffed animals, decorations for room walls, simple furniture (bean bag chairs, juvenile shelving for toys and storage, etc.). Contributions to help with the costs of shipping and to purchase larger items will also be gleefully received."

If you have any 'used, but in good condition' items that are listed above, and have been looking for a place to donate them, they'd love them!

An Orphanage Baby Shower

I recently got an e-mail from our adoption agency asking for people to donate various items to the orphanage we're working with in Haiti. I thought I'd pass it along, in case anyone is interested.

Here's some of the e-mail:

"Our Haiti partner has recently secured a building for the orphans to call home while they are awaiting their adoptive families. The orphanage will need many things from mattresses to bottles, diaper creme to tennis shoes, thermometers to a refrigerator. Haiti is not a manufacturing country and therefore must import most all of it's goods. So many Lifelink families and friends have asked to be a part of a hands-on project that we through some of you might like to participate in this worthwhile cause for children. Lifelink's Florida office will collect items and arrange for transport to Haiti. To make the process a bit easier, Lifelink has "registered" with Target.com and Babiesrus.com. At the sites, you can see the needed items, purchase, and have your item(s) shipped directly to Lifelink's Florida office. All donations are tax deductible! Lifelink is very excited about the opportunity to care for children in Haiti! Your care and support is greatly apprecitated!

If you're interested here are the links to the orphanage's registries. Basically, you can just order from there and have it sent to the agency's Florida office where they will then deliver the items to Haiti.

Target Registry

Babies 'R 'Us Registry

Also an FYI: there are some Target.com discount codes here.

Went Public

We sent out a mass e-mail this past week, and its now 'public news' that we're adopting. We have gotten so many e-mails filled with support, encouragment, excitement, etc. Thanks so much!!!

I thought I'd write a post addressing some questions that people asked:

Can we share your blog with other people?

• Yes! We're hoping that our blog will not only keep our family and friends up-to-date with our adoptions, but also that it will be helpful to other people who are thinking about adopting. Plus, we can use all of the prayers and good wishes available :-)

Are you adopting a boy or a girl?

• We don't know... we can state a preference but we're not sure if we are going to do that or not. Basically, we'd love to have another baby boy or have a baby girl!

When will the baby be home with you?

• Hopefully by January 2008, but that's really in the hands of the U.S. & Haitian government. Everything is waiting on how long it takes for them to process paperwork.

How old will your new baby be?

• Our preference is for young-as-possible. In Haiti, the youngest child available for international adoption is 6 months old. Of course, that means 6 months old at time of referral, so we're assuming that the baby will be anywhere from 10-14 months when he/she arrives in the United States. So, Josh and the new baby will likely be within a year of each other age wise.

Is there anything we can do?

• As of now, it would be awesome if anyone interested would check out the book, Cross Cultural Adoption, from the library and read through it sometime before next January. Its a simple read and addresses popular questions about international adoptions. Its aimed at answering children's (who aren't adopted) questions about their adopted friends. Yet, I thought it was also a great way for everyone to understand how questions and comments they say in front of an adopted child can impact them. I'll let you know as I find other books that would be helpful too. For now, that's the shortest, easiest to read book I've found that gives good suggestions!

Checked off the list

Jay's Spring Break was this past week, and we had the chance to get lots of adoption related items checked off our list.

1) Health Physicals and Blood Tests. The numerous forms that the doctor needed to fill out for foster care licensing and for our dossier are now signed and notarized.

2) Psychological Evaluation. Jay and I are pleased to announce that we're both in fine mental health, and most importantly its in writing, signed, and notarized.

3) Local Background Checks: We now have documented by the local police station that we have no criminal records. Unfortunately, this paperwork still needs to be notarized. The police station's secretary has less than a year left on her notarization stamp, and for the dossier, a notary has to have at least a year left on their stamp. (We have no idea why). So we're waiting a few weeks until she gets her new stamp.

4) Fingerprinting: Once taken digitally for Foster Care, once taken with ink for the FBI by our local police station, and once taken for INS on this really high tech looking machine. Funny story: the INS only has a few sites throughout the U.S. in which to get fingerprinted. The closest site to our house is in Hammond, Indiana. So we drove the 2+ hours north to Hammond and found the site in an abandoned strip mall located behind an abandoned K-Mart. Not exactly the place we'd expected government offices to be located! We found it humorous so decided to take some pictures:

We're almost done with the paperwork on our end. That's a nice feeling! We're approaching a waiting period while papers get processed here and there.

The Paper Pregnancy

We met with our Social Worker, Diane, last night and found out some more details. We also learned why adoption is often nicknamed a 'paper pregnancy.' The amount of paper shuffling that will go on over the next few months is ridiculous! For example, we have to get certified copies of our birth certificates (makes sense). Then we have to send those to Springfield, where they will staple a piece of paper to the top stating that it is definitely a certified copy. Next it goes to Chicago to be translated into French by the 'official' translators. From there is goes to the Haitian Consulate where it will be further authenticated, before we send it to Haiti. And if at any point anyone removes a staple from it, its considered invalid and we have to start all over.

We also have realized that a large amount of the fees for an adoption are spent simply because government agencies don't communicate with one another very well. For example, the 3 different sets of fingerprints we have to have taken at 3 different locations (one place that is 3 hours away from us), because you know, our fingerprints may change each time :-P Or how when we return from Haiti, the Department of Immigration will already have issued a certificate of citizenship. However, the Social Security Office doesn't recognize their fellow government dept's certificate, and thus we'll have to go through the courts and ~$1000 to get a different certificate stating that the child is indeed a US citizen. Lots of hoops to jump through! Honestly, we all were giggling a bit at some of the steps that have to take place!

Diane is amazing and we're really excited to get to work with her. She seems like she's going to try to make the entire paperwork process as smooth as she can for us. Time line wise we're hoping to have all of our paperwork (Dossier) sent off to Haiti by the end of the summer. Once the Dossier is in Haiti we should receive a child referral very quickly. Once we accept a referral we then play the waiting game with the courts in Haiti.

I'm excited to get started on all of this paperwork in front of me. Organizing and filling out forms are actually some of my favorite type of tasks so that's a definite positive! I'll add more details in a later post.

Starting Paperwork

We're now in the beginning stages of the Home Study process. Every type of adoption requires a Home Study. As quoted from Wikipedia, "a home study is a lengthy document prepared by a social worker who meets with the family and inspects the dwelling to verify that the family would make suitable adoptive parents. " Before we can send any paperwork to Haiti (aka, the dossier), this first needs to be completed. We've been told that it typically takes 3-4 months through our agency and during that time we'll also be filling out the dossier.

This weekend, we spent several hours answering numerous questions for the Self-study essay. 17 typed pages and, in our opinion, one well written paper later we finished that part. Basically, the questions covered most everything in our lives :-P From reading this our social worker will now know details ranging from our childhood favorite sports to disciplining strategies to our pet-peeves and lots of misc info. in between!

We have our first meeting with our Social Worker, Diane, in early March.

Why Haiti?

Most of the time when people adopt internationally they start by choosing a country and then finding an agency that specializes in adoptions from that country. We went about it backwards; we didn't have a country preference so we started by choosing an agency and then choosing from the countries that they worked with.

We decided that ideally we'd like to work with a local agency. I found some agency names and started calling around. Eventually we ended up at an agency about a mile from our home. We had heard their name mentioned before and had heard only positives. Their references and history were impressive, and the representative we met with was very willing to work with us. It was a good fit!

The agency gave us a list of the countries that they worked with (~10). All along we have felt that God wanted us to adopt from a country with high need. Each of those 10 countries obviously had a need but two countries in particular stood out to us: Haiti and the Philippines. The agency representative we talked with thought these would be a good match for us due to many reasons, and we decided to focus on them. (If you'd like to know more about why the other 8 countries weren't ones we looked into, just ask)

There was a slight problem though. Out of the 10 countries, those 2 and China were the only ones that had specific requirements that we don't meet. (For Philippines both spouses must be >27 yrs. old: For Haiti both spouses must be >30 yrs. old and married for >10 yrs.) So we had to get special permission from the countries. Our agency was optimistic though (hence, why they suggested them in the first place). But we couldn't move forward until we knew for certain.

• Within the week we heard that their Haiti contact and Philippines contact did not think it would be a problem but they needed to check with their higher-ups.
• Another week later we heard that the Philippines higher-up said our ages would not be a problem (yea!) but they needed to double-check with their higher-up (we've heard that this trail of waiting is pretty typical with all international adoptions).
  
• Our wait continues. A hurricane in the Philippines delayed communication and the meeting in Haiti was pushed back. More waiting.
  
• We receive news that Haiti has accepted us! We're excited, yet now are faced with 'how will we decide between the two countries?' It sounds like we are able to adopt from either one so we have a challenging decision to make.
• The following week we hear the final word on the Philippines: Josh's age has to be 2 yrs. older than our adopted child, meaning we'd have to wait at least 3 more years before the Philippines will okay us. The decision is easily made -

We're adopting from Haiti!

"We will go and ransom our child" Reworded from Isaiah 50:2

Why International?

When we first started thinking about adoption we really didn't know much. We soon learned that there are three general kinds of adoption: domestic infant, domestic foster care or international. All three are great ways to adopt, and each needs families to adopt from them! Our decision to go with international in no way diminishes the other two types. Rather as we've researched and talked to agencies, we're realized that for our particular situation, international just is the best fit.

Domestic Infant:
This type of adoption is done when a pregnant birthmom here in the United States decides to give her child up for adoption. Typically, the birthmom and adoptive parents work together through an agency/lawyer. Adoptive parents put together a profile of themselves, and the birthmom looks through these profiles and decides on the adoptive parents. The adoptive parents usually meet the birthmom, may even be present for the birth, and often stay in contact for years after. Within a few days of the birth, the child is given to the adoptive parents.

As we talked to various agencies and lawyers that focus on domestic infant adoption we learned that there are a lot of adoptive parents hoping to adopt this way. In fact, in many instances there is a waiting list that can range from several months to years for adoptive parents to wait for a match. Biologically we can still have children, and we felt that if we were going to adopt we'd like to go with children who had more 'high need.' Children in this situation will very likely be adopted into loving homes, so we decided to look other places.

Foster Care:
Each state has its own foster care system. Most children who reside in foster care were placed there because their birthparents were considered deemed unfit by the state. The goal of foster care is to eventually reunite children with their birthparents, and so children stay with a foster family until the state either decides that their birthparents are fit to be guardians again or the child is placed for adoption.

This appealed to us greatly. However, each state's system is different and in the State of Illinois, while there are many children waiting to be adopted, the vast majority of these children are over the age of 6. We were told on several occasions by different state sources that our chances of adopting a child under the age of 6 in Illinois are little to none. We're not at a place in our lives where a child 6 or over really makes sense, so foster care was ruled out.

International:
International adoption is exactly how it sounds: you adopt from a country other than the U.S. Each country differs in terms of requirements to adopt from there, age of children available for adoption, cost, etc. Typically though, you can adopt a child 6 months or older. The reasons that countries offer international adoption also vary. Usually it is because the country has an overwhelmingly large #of orphans, and due to extreme poverty or country regulations (such as China's one-child policy) people within their own country are not able to adopt many of these children. The statistics are staggering for orphans overseas and many will likely live in orphanages throughout their entire childhood and in some situations not survive until adulthood if not adopted internationally.

Being able to adopt a child younger than Josh (we'd like for him to remain the oldest) and adopting from a place with obvious need makes international adoption the clear choice for us.

Next up, determining which country...

“For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” Jeremiah 29:11

Why Adoption?

So how did we even start thinking about adoption?

Ever since Molly first watched Anne of Green Gables, adoption has always been something she has thought about :-) But, when we got married the topic just seemed to get buried in the back of her mind-- it just seemed 'natural' to have biological children unless there was some sort of problem. In September 2006, our church had a speaker come and talk at a retreat. His talk had nothing to do with adoption, but we had a chance to chat with him over lunch one day and learned that he and his wife were in the process of adopting 2 children from Africa. Listening to his heart for adoption and hearing about the many orphans who are in need of families, Molly's heart was moved. She could see adoption as something that may lie in our future. Yet, at that time Josh was only 4 months old, and so the thought got put to the side.

In November 2006, the topic came up again. This time prompting both of us to say that it was something we needed to look more into. Family Life Ministries and Focus on the Family (2 radio broadcasts that we occasionally listen to) had teamed up during National Adoption Month to air programing specifically related to orphans. As we listened to these messages we felt we were being spoken to directly. At this point we started doing some research, and prayed a lot. As the weeks went by, adoption started popping up in numerous areas of our day-to-day lives. Our hearts continued to be moved. We talked with pastors, watched documentaries, read books, listened to sermons, etc. Each time, the message was the same, we should adopt! (Here's a link to these and other mp3 messages)

We are at the point now where we know that we want to have more children, and it does not matter to us if they come biologically or through adoption. At this time, we feel that God is calling us to add to our family through adoption. We know that there are children who need families, and we want to be that family for one of them!

“Behold, I will do something new” Isaiah 43:19

About Us

For our first post, it seems fitting to start by describing us.

We met in college, started dating our freshman year, and got married 4 years later (July 2003). We moved into our first apartment, and Molly began teaching middle school math while Jay started graduate school. In May 2006, we had Josh. He's 9 months old now, and is crawling, pulling himself up, and has a killer smile (dimples and all!). Molly now is a stay-at-home mom and loves it, and Jay is teaching high school math and physics. The three of us and our cat, Milo, live in a small, cozy house in a neighborhood that we love.